Captions

Have you ever heard of "icanhascheezburger.com" if not then go and look for yourself. It's a site about cats talking with slurs and lisps and poor grammar. Some pictures are funny such as this...












Then there is unfunny picture where people will caption a cat just looking at the camera...












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So there you have it unfunny pictures with crappy grammar. LOLcats is very popular on the internet, but as we all know with the Rick Astley incident it was only a matter of time before people not familiar with the internet got a hold of it. That means something funny turned into something else (not funny)

Another complaint I have is if you have ever read the comments for each picture then you know how stupid the site is...





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It looks like the comments in the image above are written by illiterate shit heads that don't have a life. Oh wait I went a little personal there....













Yeah that's right I don't give a damn if I hurt your feelings. Also have you ever seen those motivational posters that have funny stuff on them instead.














I could do that all I need is a picture of something and say something cheezy and not funny in order for it to work. Here is my own motivational poster.













The last caption problem is the FAIL captions. It's basically a picture of something ironic or something done poorly and a big FAIL stamp on it like so...










It's not terrible but some people will stamp anything like a regular occurring accident at a skate park and will say fail.
All of these are annoying and need to be stopped or tamed before another Rick Astley incident occurs.

Person I Hate This Moment The Most

This article is a every once in a while piece about someone I hate at this exact point.

GORE VERBINSKI

As you may or may not know Gore directed these pieces of work...










That's right "Pirates of The Caribbean". First of all those movies were boring and I suffered as bad as a fan of the Buffalo Bills after losing 4 Superbowls in a row.












So not only did this guy direct THREE of the crappiest movies ever, HE ALSO MADE MONEY FROM IT. This guy is famous and rich because he starred Orlando Bloom, and Johnny Depp.
Another Question, how many times can Orlando Bloom make the same face and call it acting.











My final complaint is that he started a franchise that encourages the production of more shitty movies. We know Hollywood won't let this series die as popular as it is. They will milk it until it dries up.

Lumina Vans

I have been waiting a while to write this article about my favorite vehicle....











The Chevy Lumina Minivan is the best vehicle out there. Am I right? Why do I love this van, well because I can make fun of it in so many ways. I will do this once a week I will call it

WHAT DOES MATT HATE ABOUT LUMINA VANS??

So this weeks topic is what the van is made of. The Lumina Van is made of plastic, that's right, plastic. So let's say after years and years of hard work and dedication from your vehicle it breaks down. Under normal circumstances you would sell it or send it to a junkyard as scrap metal. This van however can not be sent to a junkyard for scrap metal as it's made of plastic.

I know this because my family once had one when I was a child. Now when it broke beyond repair we called the junkyard guy. His policy was "We will take your vehicle no matter what condition it is in". The idea being he tows it and pays you a few bucks and you don't have a car on your lawn. Not in this case, the guy came and then changed his motto to "We will take your metal vehicles".

Cars Shaped Like Cubes

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't there a point to making cars as aerodynamic as possible. I have seen so many cars lately in the shape of boxes or pretty close to a box. I know this sounds crazy, but I do have experience with aerodynamics (I made a pine wood derby car in scouts). The car that one the race the most often was the wedge shaped car. The car with the least amount of wind resistance. These days however I see cars like....











What were they thinking when they built these cars. The prototype looked a bit like this...










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So what's next are our sports cars going to bricks on wheels. All I know is the car looks shitty and can be confused with a UPS truck...